If God is good, why did this happen?

This is the hardest question there is, and Christians shouldn't pretend otherwise. When a friend asks it after a loss, they usually aren't asking for a lecture.

Start where Jesus started

When his friend Lazarus died, Jesus knew he was about to raise him. He wept anyway. God doesn't stand at a distance from pain. In Jesus he stepped into it.

What the Bible doesn't say

It doesn't say every hard thing is a punishment, and it doesn't promise we will always know why. It does promise that suffering won't have the last word.

How to help a friend

Show up. Listen more than you talk. It's okay to say "I don't know why this happened." If you're worried about someone's safety, tell a trusted adult right away.